I just celebrated my second year of freedom from the corporate world. Retirement is liberating, sometimes lonely, and sometimes frustrating.

I describe retirement as riding in a car at 100 mph and then suddenly hitting a concrete wall. Everything just stops! No phone calls to take, no meetings to attend, no emails to answer, no deadlines, no projects to complete – and, above all, no goals to fulfill.

Along with those observations come some things that are pleasing to the senses:

  • I don’t have to do it your way.
  • I don’t have to do it today.
  • I don’t have to be on time, so don’t set your watch by me.
  • I now set my own schedule.
  • I don’t have filters on what I say or think any more, so don’t ask. You may not like the answer.
  • I don’t always have to be pleasant. Now it is an option.
  • That’s not my problem; it’s yours.
  • Don’t tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about.
  • Better you than me.
  • Don’t push me, or I will take my toys and go home.
  • I don’t live by your rules – just mine and God’s.
  • Don’t give me any high school excuses. I was in high school way before you.
  • Don’t try to scare or threaten me. It doesn’t affect me any more.
  • Don’t sell me a line of BS. I can smell it a mile away.
  • Don’t tell me to have a nice day. Every day is a nice day.
  • I don’t need your money. I have my own.
  • If the shoe fits, it’s your shoe – not mine.
  • If I go out of my way to help you, show me some gratitude, or I will happily go away.
  • Take my advice. It comes from the heart, with years of experience, and it worked for me.
  • I don’t have heroes or look up to anyone any more. I am a survivor and made it this far, so I am my own hero.

If we get past all this after we meet, I will make every effort to give you a laugh and put a smile on your face. Only a retired person can understand these words. Have a nice day!

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